The “ Rocket Quickie”

28 March 2015

Our return trip up from the South island has been pretty quick, and our stop overs dictated more by cabins with Sky TV to watch cricket, than the need to catch up with blogs, and sleep in tents!

This out of sequence blog has forced its way to the front of the queue, before we forget! Our leg up from Tauranga to Orewa beach was about5 260kms, and meant fighting with Auckland’s Friday exodus, (more bad driving and road rage than usual, even by NZ’s underwhelming standards!)

So we detoured passed a Countdown, to pick up a bottle of cold Chardonnay, and a roast chicken for supper, and managed to erect our tent just in time before the heavens opened. An hour later, it was all gone, and the sun came out again. Mary and I laid our plastic African print table cloth on the camp table, set out our meal, and opened the Chardonnay. We seemed to be the only people watching the lovely sunset over the Owera beach.

I then became aware of the bright orange “Rocket” camper, 2 metres to our right,  beginning to take on a life of its own. I pointed this out to Mary, and asked, “Do you think what I think???” She took one look, and by then the rocking and bouncing had evolved into an unmistakable frenzy… Mary whispered back..”Oh …yes…. Definitely YES!!!”

The sudden realisation of our very close proximity to this primeval passion, made normal conversation, wining and dining somewhat awkward… so we sat there smiling knowingly, sipping our wine, waiting…….

After an impressive period of activity, the rocking slowed down to zero, and Mary said, ”At least they did not have squeaky springs!” Like a passing storm, calm was resumed, without even a Meg Ryan style “YES…YES…..!” or even a murmur.  Impressive self control we thought…. Unless it was a damp squib!

5 minutes later, a boxer shorted young man emerged with sponge bag and towel, and headed off to the “bluts” without giving us a sideways glance.

I, of course,  was more interested in seeing to object of his affections!  After some time had passed, when no-one else appeared, I began to think that this “Rocket Concierto”, must have been a Solo Artist……., when suddenly , the sliding door opened, and out popped a very flushed, pretty young woman, almost wearing her strappy sundress! She just smiled at us as if she had won the Olympic Gold, and said in her German accent,” Good evening!”

I was quite impressed with myself for managing to calmly reply, “Goeten Abendt?”, when what was really on the tip of my tongue, was “Goeten Bumpsen??”